Opportunities

Been a little while. With the madness that is spring semester of junior year, I'm delighted to say that I've finally found a reprieve. This week (SPRING BREAK WOOOOHOOO), I'll be going down south to explore the history of the civil rights movement. 

I feel so immensely blessed to be apart of this trip.

Alliance and Understanding (AU) has functioned as a cultural dialogue between the historical relationships between minority groups, specifically Blacks and Jews. After a series of lectures ranging from discussions on the non-violence preparations and demonstrations to the role of Jewish women during the Civil rights movement, the program culminates in a spring break trip to Atlanta, Selma, Burmingham, and Montgomery. Once there, we plan to travel through the history of the civil rights movements, visit the various notable sights, and potentienally meet individuals who have experienced the events surrounding the movement. 

I anticipate the trip to be exciting, but also very heavy. We're planning to visit the church that was bombed and the four little girls who perished. Heavy. 

I'm not too sure what to expect but my mind and heart are forever open to whatever may happen. I hope to walk away with a deeper sense of self through learning about others who sacrificed for me. I hope to gain a deeper respect, a deeper understanding. I hope to learn how to engage more actively with history and to always ask questions. I hope to become a leader in discussions about race relations and tensions-- from then and now. 

Lastly, I just hope to make the most of this experience. Besides the fact that I actually have somewhere to go this year, it's actually something meaningful. I'm ready to engage everything fully, holding nothing back. I'm ready to truly feel, and to be unafraid of doing so. 

So with that, let the chronicling begin.

Be kind to yourself. Take the extra time in the shower to just let the warm water roll down your back. Sip warm tea heartily and let it soothe your insides. Kiss the aches in your cramped hand. Dance wildly to your favorite song and laugh. Cry extra hard when you need to. Hold yourself, tightly. Send a wish up in the clouds every night. Dream. Wiggle your toes in warm water. Wear fluffy socks and flowy skirts. Use extra soft blankets. Sing until you can feel the notes streaming down your face.
 Taste the salt in your tears and remember that your soul is as vast as the ocean. You are its depths. Spray body spray, everywhere. Put rings on every finger. Adorn yourself. Please yourself. Love yourself.

Real Queens Wake Up Like This: The #Flawless Challenge

It just really aggravates me when people are obsessed with bringing others down. Deplorable. Beyonce's song "Flawless" in which she says "I woke up like this..."(and also features feminist Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie) was meant as a mantra young women and girls could use for empowerment. We need to constantly reaffirm for ourselves that our beauty is timeless, effortless, and flawless in a world that has told us we are not. We need to do this because we live in a world in which if we google beauty, our faces are absent or scarce. I get that. What I don't get is that our moment almost always has to be snatched away by those who feel the need to constantly belittle, ridicule, and demean us. The kicker? A lot of the time, the hate created and circulated are by our own Black people. So I have to wake up to a meme with the caption "Bitches be like 'I woke up like this'" accompanied by a picture of an animal. Really Black people? Really? I understand that with everything, there will always be some kind of criticism, but why does it have to be to the point of shaming others?

I'll present to all my ladies a challenge. Take a picture of yourselves when you initially wake up. Smile. No filter. Caption it "I woke up like this" and include the hashtag #Iwokeuplikethis. Submit it to ourbellanaturale.tumblr.com/submit. Then share it on your social media. I want to make a compilation and archive it with the hashtag. Yes, people may laugh, but the joke will get old when they realize that true beauty is embracing your true self at anytime. Their ridicule wouldn't matter when they see that black girls and women love themselves beyond the negativity, ugliness, and self-hate around them. Soon we could re-write those memes to say "Real Queens say 'I woke up like this.'" 

Stay flawless my queens. 

Link to submit: http://ourbellanaturale.tumblr.com/submit

11:11

The moon hears my whispers

Every night

My notes float up 

Through the clouds

But they seem to miss

You're still not mine

Dormi

I want

to close my 

eyes and 

taste you 

in 

my dreams.

Six reasons to go to South Africa

1) The music: I went during the National Arts Festival in Grahamstown and it was phenomenal (See "From the Big Apple to the Prickly Pear" post). In addition to the dances, plays, and shows I watched, South Africa reveals a rich tradition filled with all kinds of music. Jazz, soul, chants, raps, everything was just magnified by the rawness and beauty in melody.

2) The history: Being that I've been learning American history since kindergarten, it's refreshing to hear another side of history. I went to your called "Exhibit A" which was a slave museum and I was shaken. Never had I been exposed to the gruesome  and scenes that took place so long ago. Nothing was sugar coated. It was completely bare. 

3) The culture: Being able to submerge myself into the different languages, tastes, and scents, it was almost overwhelming. It's almost surreal because being a tourist  makes you feel distant but you connect so deeply with your surroundings that you can't help but feel tied to it by spirit. It moves through you as your mind takes in everything it has to offer.

4) The people: I met some amazing people in South Africa who helped open my mind to their culture a little better. They spoke Khosa and Afrikaan. I was delightfully confused but completely receptive. It helps to go in with an open mind and to leave bleak assumptions at the door.

5) Riding Elephants: Need I say more?

6) You'll enjoy it: Before my trip, my whole family warned me to be careful and not get kidnapped. While it's great to be cautious, don't let it hinder your ability to have fun! I met some amazing people, ate some great food and had great once in a lifetime experiences. It came at a point and time of my life when I was discovering myself and grappling with my identity. Even if you feel like you've got yourself all figured out, you'll be pleasantly surprised as to what South Africa brings out in you. 

Forgive a Forgetful Me

I may forget that we first met on a Tuesday

But I'll remember the song my heart sang when

It felt

You

I may forget the color of your favorite shirt

But I'll remember the scent of your skin

As it clung to the neatly stitched fabric

I may forget your sister's name

But I'll remember the soft shift of your tone

Whenever you spoke to her

Or spoke to me

I'll never forget the way your fingerprints 

Molded into mine

And how I sometimes

Lose myself 

In you

How your voice imprints my skull

And every thought is a rich melody

Only I can hear

Only I can enjoy

So forgive me when I forget sometimes

I'm too busy remembering the

Crinkles of your smile

Patter of your feet

Curves of your face

Confines of your mind

Rhythm of your breath

Chiming of your heart

The depths of your soul

Forgive me